Distracted thoughts.

CLAT is on my head, and I cannot study. Kill me now. -_________-

I am panicking, and panicking some more. I dont know what will happen, where I will go, and its eating me up. But also something that is eating me up from inside is my friendships with people.

I have ALWAYS considered myself to be a people person, as someone who talks a lot and makes friends easily. Some who supports people when they need it, applauds when they do well, and console when life isnt that easy. But recently, I have begun to feel lonely. I dont know if I have any friends anymore, someone who stands with you whatever happens. I do have Chirag, and he means a lot, dont get me wrong, but I dont know. It just feels strange.

All my life, I have done things to be accepted. To be a part of the larger group, to always have people around me. But now when I stop and look around, I feel as if my fears are coming true, almost. I sit, and I have no one to go to, just, no one.

Other than Chirag, that is. He is one person who ALWAYS supports me, always handles me in the most perfect way ever. He is the one I can always depend on. But, I am scared of depending too much. Past and the world around has shown me, that people leave, and you are left to pick up the pieces.

Strangely, writing this makes me feel at peace.